My room

Happy (almost) birthday sister!

In addition to saying Happy Birthday to my sister, here is the run down over the last week. It has been fairly crazy to say the least. I made it here alright, my classes are awesome, I think that I will really enjoy all of them and learn a lot from them. I also think that I will be learning a lot from outside of class. Just by looking at the load that I have I anticipate growth by stretching. That always the most peasant way to grow, but almost always effective.

Right now God has really been challenging me to give back to Him through the church. I have heard story after story about how God provides and that I should be giving. A teacher here offhandedly mentioned, "you ask God for money, but you aren't willing to give back to Him. no wonder He isn't giving you money." It was/is a real challenge to consider giving to the church. At this point, I have a little less than what I need to stay at school and giving would seem insane. If I gave it would mean risking being able to stay at school. I honestly have no idea how I would get enough money even if I don't give to the church, but to give would put me well under where I would need to be.

I don't doubt that God can provide for my bills, I just question if He will provide for my bills. That is really my concern. I have read the bible enough to know that God has done some really awesome things in the past and He is fully capable of doing them again, I just wonder if He will. I haven't had any problems yet, which gives me confidence that He will be faithful to provide. I was able to get here alright and make my first two payments, so I will continue to trust that God wants me here and that He will provide for me to be here. That is really where I am at right now with that.

On top of that, I also am looking for a church to go to this year. Hopefully one that I can stay at until I am done here. I am tired of church hopping. I want to get committed to a church, build relationships and become a part of the ministry out here. I am heading to one tomorrow that a friend has been going to, he says that it is good. I thought it would be worth a shot. There is another one that I wanted to go to, but the ride there was unavailable this weekend and so I had to change my plans. I just want to find a good local church family that I can become a part of. I miss being part of a church family.

Speaking of plans. I have defiantly noticed how much my plan doesn't matter and it has everything to do with God's plan. Sometimes I come up with the same plan that He has, otherwise I just end up going with His. It just works out that way. I have tried a few different times, but it always ends up differently than I would have planned because it is God's planning and not my own.

on a less serious note: I wish I had brought more pants. For some reason I only brought three pairs of pants (only two of which even fit). I was so worried about bringing too much that I didn't even bring enough. Oh well. I will pick some up when I had home for thanksgiving I think.

TTFN

Round 2

Here we go again (Post Number Fifty!).

I'll be heading out at around 5 or 6 tomorrow morning. It should be a fairly quick trip out there this time, we don't have as many people to bring this time. I still have just as much to bring though.

I look forward to getting back to school, kind of. I'm kind of nervous about the load that I have this year, but I trust that God will provide enough time for me to get things done just as I trust that He will provide the financial support that I need. 

I learned so much this summer, it is crazy. How to trust God seemed to be a big one this summer. Trusting that God would provide enough money for me to go back to school (and He did), that I would have enough time/help to get the work done at camp for the week.

Amazing story! At one point this summer I was asked to run zip-line. The problem was that it takes at least 3 people to run it, and the other guys had other jobs that week. I was done for sure I thought to myself, there is just no way. Everyone is busy doing something and I need one more person. Just when I was about to lose it my brother shows up randomly to pick up the car. He asked: anything that I can do while I'm up here? I was blown away that God would provide my brother to "randomly" come up and help me run zip-line.

I have gotten to the point that I know that God will do impossible things just because He can. Just like the story and Gideon and his three hundred men, God made an impossible situation just so He could show Himself strong. That is the story of my summer, God making possible the impossible. It sure was an experience. I still wonder when in those situations if I will make it through, but then I remember the things that I have already gone through and rest at ease. I at least know, even if I don't make it through that God is very much in control and that He is doing something absolutely amazing in the process (I just may not know about it).

When I last did the math I am still short on paying for school, which is fine because it just means that God is going to have me trusting Him even into the school year. It is stressful and uncomfortable, but I feel that is where He wants me. It is hard to trust in someone fully when I'm not in a situation where I have to trust fully. So this works out nicely for that.

I had the chance to talk to a old friend the other day. It was really good to talk. There was some rough spots that needed to be worked out, and that conversation made for a start. It will be a while before there is any normality to the friendship, but I was just trilled to at least start at it. The Bible says that we need to, if at all possible, live at pace with all people. This friend of mine was one of those people that I wasn't exactly living at pace with, so it was good that we were able to have a conversation and work somethings out (Thanks for talking).

To God be glory and honor, for He is worthy of praise

Summer is over

Hello everyone. My summer is basically over with now. I have about twelve days left of work and then I head back out to school. I am really looking forward to school but at the same time I am somewhat scared. The load that I will be taking this fall is a little larger than I was planing for and it is making me kind of nervous, I don't want to fail anything.

I was talking with a friend of my today about what we had learned over the summer. I think it is a good idea to look back on things and try to articulate what was learned from the experience. So, I am inviting you to join me as I tell of what I had learned this summer.

I think over all, the biggest thing that I learned (and still am learning to do) is to trust God. With big things, little things. Everything. Like I have said in other post I have been read Soul Revolution, and one of the chapters is about taking risk and trusting God. It was about that time that I knew that I wasn't going to have enough money to go back to school. I simply wasn't making enough. It logically wasn't going to happen, there was no way. 

Meanwhile, as I deal with the logical contradictions of going to a school that I can't pay for, I had a good conversation with a friend about the subject. He was telling me about his experience about going through college without money and also how he sent his two kids through college and ended without any debts. It was greatly encouraging to know that God is working and providing in that situation, because I knew that God could do the same for me. I had to trust Him though.

As the summer drew on and bills were starting to come I started to do some math. I was short by a fairly large amount of money, but I continued to trust that if God truly wanted me to go to school He would grant me enough money to go back. I even prayed for enough money to go back (I'm not sure if that was right,but I did it anyways - I don't think God mined that much). All summer I noticed that I was being paid a little less than I thought I should, so just this last week I asked about it. Turns out I was being paid short ten dollars every week all summer, making for about another weeks pay check, making enough for me to go back to school. Praise God. I guess I need to go to school, because He provided enough for me to go.

One week I was short on staff for what I needed to do, I didn't know how it was going to work out, there was just no way. That morning when I needed help my brother showed up randomly. I was blown away. God provided the hands that I needed to complete the job.

These were just some incidents where God showed His grace and provided for me. Other times He would give me energy, sleep, rest, people, time. All summer I would have to trust that God would give me enough to make it through the week. He did. It isn't easy to trust Him like this, but it is what we as Christians are called to do. Walk by faith and trust in God and not the logic and reasoning that this world gives us. 

Random quote from my sister: "PEOPLE ARE STUPID." Remember this all your life, it will help you a lot.

The summer was a lot harder for me than I thought it was going to be, but it was what I needed. I learned a lot and had some fun in the process. Thanks for those that have been praying for me over the course of the summer, it means more than I know.

I will continue to blog at school and wherever I end up. Everything from my dentist appointments to the great things that God is doing in my life. 

Thanks for reading

~Jeremy

Yay horay!

I have one more week of 'camp' left in the summer and two more guest groups after that. The end is within sight now. Right around three weeks then I'll be done and head back off to school
for the remainder of the year. I have really enjoyed working at camp this summer, I could not have picked a better job for the summer.

Over the summer I was stretched in ways that I didn't think that I would have been, but from it I grow and it made it all worth it. I now trust God more than I have before in ways that I haven't before. I truly believe that God does provide for our needs in amazing ways if we dare to trust him with our needs. I have done just that, and the outcome of trusting God is almost unbelievable. Trusting God wasn't the most comfortable things though, nor the most rational. I was told by a few different people that what I was/am doing is not the more educated choice I have ever made.

Trusting God is to go beyond what is comfortable and waiting just that extra day for God to provide. If we fall to wait then we lose out on God's blessings and the life that He promises to those that trust him.

Just look at 1 Samuel 13:
Saul was told to wait for Samuel to sacrifice on the on the day that Samuel told him. Saul waited and waited and waited, but Samuel never showed up. Saul got anxious and made the sacrifice without Samuel and it was just then that Samuel showed up. Samuel asked, "What have you done?" Saul in essence says "I got nervous, and it didn't look like it would work out." Samuel says that Saul acted foolishly and because he didn't trust and obey the commands of the Lord the kingdom was taken from him.

In the same way I had to trust God. I had payments to make and I didn't know where I was going to get the money. I wasn't going to ask my parents for money, nor was I going to barrow any more. I trusted that God would provide if I truly needed to ake the payments, and He did. Turns out the money was right there and I never knew it. God provided. Even if He didn't I would be okay with it, but to see Him provide is remarkable. Unbelievable really.

The reason for the yay horay is just that, God provided. I was about a hundred dollars short for making my payment and it was just then that I noticed a printing error in my checks. I asked about them and they were about ten dollars off. Over twelve weeks, ten dollars a week makes more then what I need. I didn't even know what to do. I was awstruck but what God did. Praise be to the God that takes care of all our needs (not desires)!

60-60 experiment

A while back I wrote about an experiment that I was going to try called the 60-60 experiment. The idea is that you spend time with God every 60 minutes for 60 days. 60-60. The experiment is based off of the true vine passage found in John 15 which deals with abiding with Christ. The concept of the experiment is to see how much a person grows/changes/learns/etc by living life with God and interacting with Him throughout the day. Living out what John 15 says.

I just finished my 60 days on the 19th I think it was, or somewhere close to there. It was more of an experience than an experiment I would says. I learned so much about myself, others and how I interact with them, and a bunch of other things. Personally I think that I have just learned to trust God more because of it. Just like spending time with a real person, you learn to trust them, love them and grow on them, the same is with Christ. By spending time with Him I have learned to trust Him more (see last post, something I would have not done before having done this experiment), and grow on Him. I learn and grow simply by spending time with God, trusting him and obeying his commands.

I wish that I could say that it was easy and enjoyable, but it wasn't at times. A lot of times it was really hard and in a way painful, but being with Christ made it worth it. At times I would say that I would much rather have difficult times and have God with me than have an easy time without Him.

That is all for now. I have a football field to line by Saturday, a family reunion to go to on Saturday and I still haven't showered since Wednesday (I think). Later

This is where I am right now.

I don't like it much, but this is where I am and it is what God has for me in my life. I don't expect anyone to do anything, I don't even expect many people to read this. I just keep posting so as to keep the people that do read this up to date on what is going on with my life and what is going on during my summer at camp. To be honest I don't post as much as I should about things that really matter. I end up writing about dentist appointments rather than what God is doing in my life and the lives of others. The question comes at what matters and what doesn't. What is something that I should concern people with and what is something that should be handled by myself? I have a hard time with that, deciding what to tell people.

Regardless of the above, I want to share something something that I am going through. Due to the nature of being open and transparent with people, please be respectful with responses(if you choose to give one). Also keep in mind that this isn't a cry for attention or for pity, but an honest statement of what I am dealing with and going through right now.

This week at camp we sang the song 'lean on me' which has in the lyrics:

Please swallow your pride if I have things

You need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
that you won't let show

All this week I have been trying to swallow my pride and realize that I can't do everything on my own. Most of the time at camp it means asking for help, doing a job or getting things done in a day, but it applies to other things also. When I have a genuine need in life. I never knew what to do when I had/have needs, I still don't, but I can at least swallow my pride enough to say that I have one.

I really dislike it when people complain about things not being provided, especially money. I really do. God said that He would provide for everything that we need. Everything that we need, not want. Those two are different. I want a car and I want to finish school in the next three years, but I don't need to. God knows what I truly need and what I simply desire, and will provide accordingly. 

He has a plan for the events in my life and the needs that are required to fulfill that plan. Also just like the song says though, how can people or God fill those needs if I don't acknowledge them? How can we help one another if we don't show that we need help? How can we serve one another if we can't humble ourselves enough to show that we need? I personally would not have said any of this if not for that song.

I know that I said that I dislike people complaining, but I'm not complaining. I am saying where I am in life as honestly and openly as I know how (If everything fell through and no one did anything I would understand and be okay with it). I have a desire (God will decide if it is a need) to go to school, but as of right now I do not have the funds to pay for more than my first two payments. I won't ask my parents to help (they have more than their fair share of debts to deal with without me). I won't take out a credit card. I won't get more loans (privet ones). If God truly wants me at school than He has a plan to get me through. I don't expect it to be easy, whether I make it through sooner or later. It will be hard.

I am walking by faith and will be paying my first payment monday trusting that this is what God wants me to be doing with my life. I have already been told that what I am doing doesn't make sense and is unreasonable, but "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." -Hebrews 11:1